Cheats’ Lentils with Spicy Roasted Cauliflower & Lime

Let’s start off with the following: none of my posts are sponsored by anyone or anything. Only a fool would sponsor me to tell bad puns and write footnotes about how great my wife is.* However, should any rich fool wish to sponsor me, I have only the morals I can afford. Hit me up.

Anyway, the main reason for this disclaimer is that I am going to be plugging the everloving heck out of Merchant Gourmet today, friends.

When I found out about precooked lentils, the heavens parted and it was as though a hand came from the very sky to hand me the tin. I am forever changed. I am therefore all the more delighted by super goddamn fancy precooked lentils; as the name suggests, Merchant Gourmet lentils are fancy AF**, and I was very excited that Isla found them before I did. It shows she’s assimilating.


I used their Puglia Lentils, but they have a stupidly large range of lentils that anyone should feel blessed to have access to. If you want something a little less fancy (which is also a lot cheaper and more accessible), just drain some tinned green lentils and add a little garlic & oil when you heat them through.

Fancy is a state of mind.

Cheats’ Lentils with Spicy Roasted Cauliflower (Vegan, Gluten-free)

Serves 2
Preparation time: 5 minutes
Cooking time: 20 minutes


Medium frying pan or saucepan; lined/non-stick baking tray; stirry and cutty implements.


  • 250g pouch Puglia Lentils with Truffle Infused Oil
  • 1/2 head cauliflower (200-250g)
  • 1 tsp paprika
  • 2 tsp garlic powder (easy to find nowadays – try the Indian section of your supermarket)
  • Pinch of chilli flakes (optional)
  • 2 tsp vegetable oil
  • 1/2 lime, juiced (plus a couple of quarters to decorate if you want)
  • Salt & pepper


  1. Turn the oven to 200 and get started on your cauliflower. Cut your cauliflower into small florets — if you’ve got ready made florets, they tend to be a bit big for this dish, so cut them down to manageable bite-sized chunks. Give them a rinse and pat dry, then get them into your baking tray. Drizzle over the oil then add your paprika, garlic powder, chilli flakes, and a pinch each of salt and pepper. Toss everything together (clean hands are the best tools here) then pop into the oven for 20 minutes, or until softened and nicely coloured.
  2. Five minutes before you take out the cauliflower, heat the lentils through in a pan with the lime juice & a splash of water (or microwave them, it’s all good), then divide between two bowls — spoon the cauliflower on and around your zingy lentils and dress with the lime wedges (which can be squeezed over everything for a bigger zing).


Yes this is arguably barely a recipe but it’s very very hot outside at the moment; the last thing anybody wants to do is stand in front of a gas hob, sweating their face off. Unless that’s what you’re into? No judgement here – only lentils.


Do you love lentils as much as I do? I mean, I doubt it, but if you think you might be close, why not try one of my other lentil recipes? I was going to say ‘what’s the worst that could happen’ but I know my own track record.

*She’s SO great.

**This obviously stands for ‘As [the] French’ – everyone knows the French are super fancy. I promise I’m not swearing on the internet, mum.

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