Here is a comprehensive list of things I have eaten in the last 36 hours:

• 1.5 bananas
• 1 piece of toast with spread
• 3 pieces of toast (crusts cut off) with a scraping of Philadelphia light
• 11 Tuc biscuits
• a handful of Maltesers
• red grapes
• 1/3 portion of oven fries (only the really crispy bits)
• 1 portion of Micro Chips

I have, in other words… been unwell. There are two ways to tell I’m sick: the first is that I’m quiet for more than a minute at a time (I am a notorious loudmouth, chatterbox, and perpetual noise machine); the second is that I stop eating. I mean, I love my food. If someone were to tell me that I would never again be able to eat pizza, I would cry tears of genuine sorrow. It’s my favourite vehicle for cheese.

Lack of food aside, the other main difference between Healthy H and Dying Of The Plague H is that I do a lot more snoozin’. Interrupted snoozin’, but snoozin’ nonetheless. After a lacklustre half day of work yesterday, I collapsed on the sofa and slept for two hours. This is not something I am usually capable of doing.

(I then had Isla bring in the spare mattress so I could lie more comfortably on the floor. She is an excellent partner and absolutely not up for trade or sale)

This was really just a post to check in. And to complain a bit more, truth be told; I can’t wait to be back up to full health and blogging about food I actually want to eat again, rather than staring sadly at my third piece of toast.

(Note: I love toast. This particular toast even had its crusts cut off, courtesy of my attentive and wonderful fiancee! However, woman cannot live on toast alone.)

I hope that none of you have fallen pray to this nefarious illness – and, if you have, I hope that you have a large loaf of bread and a bunch of bananas on hand.

Hattie